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Letters to Santa
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Dec 24, 2008 5:55 pm
1600 Views
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Dear Santa,
I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud
boy all Yeer.
yer Frend,
BiLLy
Dear Billy,
Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care.
How
about I send you a frickin book so you can learn to read and write?
I'm
giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell!
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask
for is peace and joy in the world for everybody.
Love, Sarah
Dear Sarah,
Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they??
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd
like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see
what you can do??
Love Teddy
Dear Teddy,
Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a
hurri cane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your
frigid mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that
dream. Let me get you some nice Legos instead.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I want a new bike, a Playstation, a train, some G.I. Joes, a
dog, a drum kit, a pony and a tuba.
Love,
Francis
Dear Francis,
Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays? I bet you're
gay. I'll set you up with a Barbie.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I left
carrots for your reindeer outside the back door.
Love, Susan
Dear Susan,
Milk gives me the runs and carrots make the deer fart in my
face
when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Leave me a
bottle
of scotch.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
What do you do the other 364 da ys of the year? Are you busy
making toys??
Your friend,
Thomas
Dear Thomas,
All the toys are made in China. I have a condo in Vegas,
where I spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. I
unwind by drinking myself silly and squeezing the asses of cocktail
waitresses while losing money at the craps table. Hey, you wanted to
know.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know when
we're
awake, like in the song?
Love, Jessica
Dear Jessica,
Are you really that gullible? Good luck in whatever you do.
I'm
skipping your house.
Santa
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Dear Santa,
I really really want a puppy this year. Please please please
PLEASE PLEASE could I have one?
Timmy
Timmy,
That whiney begging shit may work with your folks, but that
crap
doesn't work with me. You're getting a sweater again .
Santa
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Dearest Santa,
We don't have a chimney in our house, how do you get into our
home?
Love, Marky
Mark,
First, stop calling yourself "Marky", that's why
you're getting your ass whipped at school. Second, you don't
live in a house, you live in a low-rent apartment complex. Third, I
get
inside your pad just like the boogeyman does, through your bedroom
window.
Sweet Dreams,
Santa
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AS I MATURE
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Dec 28, 2007 12:29 pm
3136 Views
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I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jerks.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof to destroy it.
I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that you better have a big willy or huge boobs.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others, they are more screwed up than you think.
I've learned that you can keep on vomiting long after you think you're finished.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be alot of money to take it's place.
I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it.
I've learned that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.
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Life, Death, and What are you doing to prepare
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Dec 2, 2007 2:10 pm
3520 Views
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Today for me is sorta sad. One of my nephew's friends, with whom he has been friends with for over 15 years was killed this morning coming home from a bar. Definatly has impacted my nephew, and my family. He is now at the friend's family house sharing with them their grief. In many ways that is a good thing for him. The point that I am trying to make is this one.
For all of us death is coming. We just don't know when. It could be now, next week, next year, but it is coming. And all of us are here only for a really short time on this earth. Are you preparing yourselves for that day? And have you prepared your family for that time?
When was the last time you said I love you to your wife, your husband, your lover, your kids, your parents?
When was the last time you really spent quality time with someone you care about? Please don't think you are not going to die.......that you are invincible. You are not. Death does not care who you are, how much money you have, how pretty you are, or how many people you sleep with. Death is final, I have yet to know anyone who has come back from the grave.
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RESPECT, EATTING CROW, AND THE ROOMS
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Oct 2, 2007 10:57 pm
3865 Views
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Well this is another interesting one. But first off I need to pay props to someone who wrote a blog very similar to this one. Jules went thru some tough times, and she aired out how she felt, it took me until tonight to really figure out some issues I have had on my mind. For that I appreciate her, and thanks to you Dangerous for putting these thoughts back on track.
You know when I first came to kff, the rooms were fun, yes most of the same people were there, I had much fun talking, chatting, getting to know people, and yes some of them too. I have been blessed that some of the people I have met have become good friends to me and are very special people. Turtle, Coucou, AngelTears, and Islandgirl to name a few are wonderful people and all have a special place in my heart. This site has given me these friends, as well as others. Aigo, Wanna, Cassie, Seanmkim, GiaGia, and K.A. are people that I never would have met if not for here. I hope to never forget any of you guys. If you ever go meet them you will understand. I wish I had met more, like sporty77, emp, and some others. But it did not happen.
But as the saying goes. I need to bid u all adew. It is time for me to go. I remember a saying that goes something like this: there is no fool, like an old fool. I am old, and I am a fool. I need to get back into my life's context and quit wishing upon stars. To all who I love and admire.......you know where I am. To all who think little of me or hate me, I wish you nothing but all what life will give you, sorry for taking up your time. I will not say good bye, and maybe will write something from time to time. Life goes on......live it to the fullest. Maybe one day you will be lucky to walk down the street with someone you love.  Me I walk alone. Cya
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RESPECT, EATTING CROW, AND THE ROOMS
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Oct 2, 2007 10:57 pm
3151 Views
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Well this is another interesting one. But first off I need to pay props to someone who wrote a blog very similar to this one. Jules went thru some tough times, and she aired out how she felt, it took me until tonight to really figure out some issues I have had on my mind. For that I appreciate her, and thanks to you Dangerous for putting these thoughts back on track.
You know when I first came to kff, the rooms were fun, yes most of the same people were there, I had much fun talking, chatting, getting to know people, and yes some of them too. I have been blessed that some of the people I have met have become good friends to me and are very special people. Turtle, Coucou, AngelTears, and Islandgirl to name a few are wonderful people and all have a special place in my heart. This site has given me these friends, as well as others. Aigo, Wanna, Cassie, Seanmkim, GiaGia, and K.A. are people that I never would have met if not for here. I hope to never forget any of you guys. If you ever go meet them you will understand. I wish I had met more, like sporty77, emp, and some others. But it did not happen.
But as the saying goes. I need to bid u all adew. It is time for me to go. I remember a saying that goes something like this: there is no fool, like an old fool. I am old, and I am a fool. I need to get back into my life's context and quit wishing upon stars. To all who I love and admire.......you know where I am. To all who think little of me or hate me, I wish you nothing but all what life will give you, sorry for taking up your time. I will not say good bye, and maybe will write something from time to time. Life goes on......live it to the fullest. Maybe one day you will be lucky to walk down the street with someone you love. Me I walk alone. Cya
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phoneys, ghosts, and untruths
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Sep 6, 2007 2:43 pm
4544 Views
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Interesting subject.......one that takes on a totally different life on line. A person does not have to be rich, or pretty, or cute, or handsome, or anything. All they have to have is a computer, and a immagination. The person then can be anything they want to be, or any immage that they want to project. And yes many people are preyed upon and prey on others on line. I really feel sorry for those who prey on others. Yes I know I am old, looked upon with distain by others but you know what? I am probably a lot happier than most, enjoy my life as much as others, and yes I do respect all. But I honestly have no time for those who don't want to show their true colors. These people make life bad for all, and I will not respect them. If this does not apply to you......but offends u, please accept my appology. If it does name u......offends u or not.........I could care less. I have much better people to be with than you. And yup....I live with it.
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7
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I'd be a perfect boyfriend
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Jun 1, 2007 3:31 pm
4418 Views
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A PERFECT BOYFRIEND
Body: Every girl dream since they were a little girl is that one day she will find a guy that does these things for her. even the smallest action can have the BIGGEST impact in someones life.
• give her one of your t-shirts to sleep in.
• leave her cute text notes.
• tell her she looks beautiful.
• look into her eyes when you talk to her.
• let her mess with your hair.
• touch her hair.
• just walk around with her.
• FORGIVE her for her MISTAKES.
• look at her like she's the only girl you see.
• tickle her even when she says stop.
• when she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her.
• let her fall asleep in your arms.
• get her mad, then kiss her.
• stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything
• tease her and let her tease you back.
• stay up all night with her when she's sick.
• watch her favorite movie with her.
• give her the world.
• let her wear your clothes.
• when she's sad, hang out with her.
• let her know she's important.
• kiss her in the pouring rain.
• when you fall in love with her, tell her.
• and when you tell her, love her like you've never loved
someone before.
• and,when she runs up at you crying...the first thing you say is..."who's ass am i beating today?"
guys forward as : i'd be this boyfriend.
girls forward as : a perfect boyfriend
if you don`t forward this in four minutes you will lose the one you love.
if you do forward this in four minutes the one you love will :
call you
kiss you
love you
text you
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11
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our many masks
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May 21, 2007 6:06 am
3881 Views
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people wear many different masks. It's true, it is oh so true. From the mask or face of the power person, to the mask or face of the beautiful person, to the mask or face of the timid person, all of us wear these different faces, at different times, and in different ways.
But what separates us from animals, or are we separated at all? A male bird might strut around showing all of his beautiful plumage to sing a beautiful mating song to lure his mate to him. A male deer will fight other males to gain his dominance over several does. And the list goes on. But are we really above and separate from animals? Are we really different.
Too many times we look at the picture, or face in front of us, and think gosh she is beautiful, or he is handsome. Too many times we push aside somebody because they are old, or plain, or fat, or ugly. Why? Why do we all preen ourselves and push ourselves to become the "pretty or handsome person"? Why do we go buy the fast car, or expensive suit, or flash our money at the fancy resterant?
Are we really different than animals? Are we really afraid to take off the masks that we wear, see who is really infront of us, and expose ourselves for all to see?
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Libra
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Apr 24, 2007 2:37 am
5018 Views
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Body: Once you have opened this, there's no turning back. Below are true descriptions of zodiac signs, with traits from a book written 35 years ago by an astrologist predictions. Read your sign, then repost it with your zodiac sign and label on the subject line, This is real deal, try ignoring it, and the first thing you'll notice is having a horrible day starting tomorrow morning - and it only gets worse from there.
AQUARIUS - Does It In The Water
Trustworthy. Attractive. Great kisser. One of a kind. Loves being in long-term relationships. Extremely energetic. Unpredictable. Will exceed your expectations. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out.
2 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
TAURUS - The Tramp
Aggressive. Loves being in long relationships. Likes to give a good fight for what they want. Extremely outgoing. Loves to help people in times of need. Good kisser. Good personality. Stubborn. A caring person. One of a kind. Not one to mess with. Are the most attractive people on earth!
15 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
VIRGO - The One that Waits
Dominant in relationships. Someone loves them right now. Always wants the last word. Caring. Smart. Loud. Loyal. Easy to talk to. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to please. The one and only.
7 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
SCORPIO - The Addict
EXTREMELY adorable. Intelligent. Loves to joke. Very Good sense of humor. Energetic. Predict future. GREAT kisser!!!!!!!!!!!. Always get what they want. Attractive. Easy going. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Caring.
4 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
LIBRA - The BADASS ONE
Nice to everyone they meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique appeal. Most caring person you will ever meet! however not the kind of person you wanna mess with... oh so sensitive, U might end up tiptoeing around...
9 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
ARIES - The sexy one
Outgoing. Lovable. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Spontaneous. Not one to mess with. Funny. Excellent kisser EXTREMELY adorable. Loves relationships, Addictive. Loud. Always gets what he or she wants. Loves to joke. Very popular.
16 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
GEMINI - Irresistible
Nice. Love is one of a kind. Great listeners Very Good in the you know where... Lover not a fighter, but will still knock you out. Trustworthy. Always happy. Loud. Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING. Loves to make out. Has a beautiful smile. Generous. Strong. THE MOST IRRESISTIBLE.
9 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
LEO - The Lion
Great talker. Attractive and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to have fun. Is really good at almost anything. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to earth. Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Good when found.
7 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
CANCER - The Cutie
MOST AMAZING KISSER. Very high appeal. Love is one of a kind. Very romantic. Most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Spontaneous. Great telling stories. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out if it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to.
12 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
PISCES - The Partner for Life
Caring and kind. Smart. Center of attention. High appeal. Has the last word. Good to find, hard to keep. Fun to be around. Extremely weird but in a good way. Good Sense of Humor!!! Thoughtful. Always gets what he or she wants. Loves to joke. Very popular. Silly, fun and sweet.
5 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
CAPRICORN - The Passionate Lover
Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Predict future. Irresistible. Loves being in long relationships. Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. Cool. Loves to own Gemini's in sports. Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Smart.
24 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
SAGITTARIUS - The Promiscuous One
Spontaneous. High appeal. Rare to find. Great when found. Loves being in long relationships. So much love to give.
Not one to mess with. Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone They meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique appeal. Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing in the you know where..!!!
Not the kind of person you wanna mess with- you might end up crying.
4 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
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8
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Life...............and the world
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Apr 22, 2007 3:37 pm
3851 Views
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Isn't it odd that these past few weeks people all over the world are suddenly taking notice of life changing events.
for example: the shootings at Virginia Tech in the United States.
Life is changing, life is becoming more and more brutal in many ways. The computer age, the television, and yes even telephones are bringing all of these events into our homes.
From the shootings at va tech, to the nuke testing in North Korea, to the recent killings at Nasa in Houston, to all of the violence in the Middle East.
Yes people life has changed, and if you haven't taken notice of it, maybe you should. I feel very sorry for the youth of the world, and the garbage they are going to have to deal with. There is very little respect for life, for truth, for happiness anymore. Where has this gone? Is it the fault of my generation not teaching this to the young. Or maybe is it a sign of the times with oh so many two income families who rely on daycare, the school systems, and total strangers for teaching their young right and wrong.
I have given this much thought over the past month and I can see that all of us have to make a much larger commitment to preserving life on this planet. It is the only one we have, and if we don't, are we going to be discarded like trash when we are too old to be a "meaningful" part of society.
think about it
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